The Excrutiating iPod Torture

Have you ever found yourself just lingering in your room wishing your life was a musical(not in the "gay" way as many would think but as in having a rad background song for every defining moment in your life) and isn´t it funny when the one time you actually do get the feeling of it is when you´re somehow sad or hearbroken?

Just think about it; you´re cruising in your car after your girlfriend just dumped you for that douchy looking guy who is 6 foot tall, has black hair and deep blue eyes and happens to be every girl´s dream but your fucking nightmare at the moment



(Kinda like this mofo, you see the point)

and just right then your dad turns on the radio and automatically the first song you guys ever shared came on the radio. You want to help yourself from crying but deep down you feel like your trapped in one of those Backstreet Boys videos where they are always in the airport dancing but nobody ever really arrives or leaves:



(Clear example of people looking sad for NO reason)


And you help yourself from crying because you know your mom or dad or whoever is with you is just going to lecture you on how awesome you are and how stupid the other person was and how they´ll regret it for the rest of their lives when deep down you know he or she might already be rocking somebody´s world (and even their bed) and you just feel like dying.

The worst part of all? You own a fucking iPod, it´s like the car radio scene throughout all day and it´s even worst given the fact that the one torturing you is no other than you. We´ve all been there, just staring at our Boyz II Men records or cranking up the Lionel Richie tunes while our soul savagely weeps and sorrow just fills up our life. I´m no Klingon but I got the answer for all your problems, CHANGE THE FUCKING SONG! I don´t care if what cheers you up is something gay like Hollaback Girl but trust me in this one, IT´S BANANAS B-A-N-A-N-A-S to beat yourself up with bluesy tunes and romantic melodies so just stiffen that upper lip and KEEP ROCKING.



(If that man can overcome being part of a racial minority with terrible stereotypes and HIV and smile, why wouldn´t you?)